Tag: No on Measure B

Safer Sex Can Be Hot!

Note: this is a follow up of my previous post Safer Sex in Queer Porn and The Condom Debate, which appeared on this site last year, and which I still feel is relevant in the condom debate. With the recent backlash against barriers from some in the adult industry, I wanted to say more on the topic.

No on Measure B

Measure B in Los Angeles is threatening to mandate the way performers shoot porn in LA County, so many of my friends and associates in the adult industry are doing everything they can in the name of performers rights and free speech to spread the word to vote No on November 6th.

Though I don’t live or vote in LA, I advocate voting NO on Measure B. (What is Measure B? A quick Internet search will yield incredible results. I also favor Gram Ponante’s post B is for Condoms, and Other Illogical Arguments and Stoya’s Testing vs Condoms in Pornography.) There are many testaments by performers and people in the industry proving our capability to take care of our health. And as you know from my post above, I believe performers should have the right to choose how they’d like to perform what feels best and safest to them just as I have found and work to assert in my own performing experience.

Ive tweeted my advocacy, and have been supportive to those in LA whose careers are most impacted. But in the past few days, Ive started to see a disappointing trend.

A barrier backlash.


Mocking Gloves and Dental Dams

Associates on Twitter performers, producers, organizations and advocates began to MOCK the use of barriers. They warned, Heres what Girl/Girl would look like if Measure B passes and Show fans what a dental dam looks like NOT HOT! and posted staged glove and dam demonstrations with captions like BUZZKILL.

My heart sunk. I impulsively hit reply to at least one of these posts, and shared my disappointment publically. Not surprisingly, I was met by opposition, with further insistence that having sex with barriers is gross.

But I was also joined by voices of support. While I agree that its not porns responsibility to educate (unless perhaps, it calls itself a sex ed guide), its my hope that porn does have an ethical obligation to work in performers best interests. Thats what we are all fighting against, after all.


Dont Yuk My Yum!

Part of being open-minded about sexuality is to not put down others consensual sex just because you dont like it for yourself. Some call this sex-positivity. I just call it being respectful, and realistic.

Not everyone enjoys sex in the same way. Sex is different, thats kind of the beauty of it. Some like to use barriers, some dont. Im not saying that all of LA should be required to use barriers. Im not saying barriered sex is the only way. Of course not.

In fact, most of the scenes Ive shot dont incorporate safer sex supplies, either because I was working with a fluid-bonded lover, or I was shooting for a production where testing was required but barriers were frowned upon. Currently, I enjoy using barriers in my personal life, and I really feel good about the opportunities I have to use them in porn.


Safer Sex can be Hot!

For me, safer sex can be hot sex because it helps me feel more confident and comfortable. I feel more freed to enjoy myself. Also, its fun to explore. Not too long ago, I gave dental dams another try, and I discovered that I LOVED the pressure of the thin, taut material against my vulva. I got so aroused by the barrier, that I forcefully ejaculated against it. Imagine pointing a fire hose against a window. That was me.

Safer sex supplies include latex and non-latex condoms, female condoms, gloves, fingercots, and dental dams. Lubricant is a big part of it too, as it provides wet slickness between materials and skin to conduct sensation and heat. There are many tips in using barriers to increase pleasure. Maybe Ill do a supplemental post on condom, glove and dental dam tips.

I think that safer sex is not a drag. I think safer sex CAN be pleasurable. And safer sex in porn CAN be really fucking hot!


Be Positive

I dont feel its my place to say that the way another person has sex is gross. If its not my thing, I simply dont partake. However if I see others shaming people, particularly within a context where there is already social stigma, I strive to stand up and advocate, just as I am doing to be vocal against Measure B.

As its my usual custom to be positive, and to make good out of a poor situation, I prefer to spend my time promoting those who are doing it right, or at least making an effort. Ill name-names in the best possible way.

There are companies I’ve worked for who go above and beyond to provide safer sex supplies on set and make it known to performers that barriers are okay. These are companies with whom I’ve made my own choices freely about safer sex practices, whether it was getting tested, using barriers, modifying sex acts based on risks, and all combinations of the above.

Please help me to spread the idea of respecting each others choices in porn and safer sex, and if you’re a voter in LA, please listen to the many, many voices in porn asking you to vote NO on Measure B.